Here's a list of various comeback jokes I got from various sites:

(In case you don't like them, I provided a list of other sites with some cool comeback jokes.)

• Hey, I may be fat, but you'll always be ugly, and I can diet.

• Man: So, how do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilized.

• Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be too, if you sit down.

• Man: Do you want to dance? Woman: NO Man: Sorry, I think you misheard me...I said, You Look fat in those pants.

• Little Sister: Your Ugly. You: And your quite good looking...for a Gorilla, that is...

• Do you notice how I've kept my youthful complexion? Yeah, so I see...all spotty

• Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You are going to yours, and I'm going to mine.

• Man: So, what's your sign? Woman: No Entry

• Man: I know how to please a Woman. Woman: Well, please leave me alone.

• Friend: I've just come back from the Beauticians You: Pity it was closed...

• Man: Please whisper those 3 little words that would make my day! Woman: Go to hell

• Friend: I've changed my mind... You: Excellent, so does the new one work better?

• Boss: Employees like that don't grow on trees you know... You: How true Sir, they normally swing underneath them...

• Brother: Why do you smell funny? You: It's called Soap - don't think you've ever smelt it before...

• Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I'm a Female Impersonator.

• Man: Hey there, haven't I seen you some place before? Woman: Yes, and that's why I don't go there anymore.

• Man: Say, haven't we met before? Woman: Yes, I'm the head Nurse at the VD clinic.

• Man: I can tell that you want me. Woman: You know, you're dead right...I want you to go away!

• Wife: Darling, do you think I'll lose my looks as I get older You: With luck, yes

• Work Colleague: Do you find me entertaining? You: I reckon you are too dim to entertain a thought

• Old Wife: Shall I put the TV on? Old Man: Well it would certainly improve the view in here...

• You know, I've been asked to get married over a hundreds times. Yeah, but your parents don't count...

• How many people work in your office? About half of them

• Brother: I love biscuits You: That's cuz your crackers

• You: I reckon you'd make a great exchange student. Friend: Wow, you really think so? You: Yes, we might be able to exchange you for someone nice.

• Man: Hey there, haven't I seen you some place before? Woman: Yes, and that's why I don't go there anymore.

Other "comeback jokes" sites:

• http://www.jokesnjokes.net/funny.jokes.amusing.humor.laughs/Obnox/comebacks001.htm
• http://www.funpike.com/view/Jokes/Miscellaneous/Comeback-Lines!/
• http://www.lifeisajoke.com/worknleisure8_html.htm (Workplace comeback lines.)

Date: 9 Oct 2007 | Author: mesmerX | Category: News | Views: 64499 » TrackBack » Print » RSS Enojyed this article? Share it and let others know: